What if you could have anything you wanted just by thinking about it?
What would your thoughts be? Would you think about money, a big house, not having to work, meeting your dream person?
What thoughts are in your mind now? This house is a mess. I’m out of shape. I’m too fat. I don’t have enough money. I’ll never get a job. I can’t pass the test.
How do you talk to & treat yourself? Often, we are not very kind to ourselves “I’m such an idiot. I always make such a mess. I’m not smart enough. I’m too slow (old, fat, dumb).” We would never speak like that to anyone else. So, why do we talk to ourselves that way? We tell others to take it easy. “You better stay home from work, you are sick”. But, do we do it ourselves “I can’t stay home, I have too much to do.” “I have to cook a big meal every night: my family expects it.”
What do you expect of yourself & of others? I have high expectations of myself. I also have fairly high expectations of others. “Yes, I am often disappointed because my expectations are not met.” Sometimes I don’t share my expectations of others with them; they should know what is expected.
Why am I asking all of these questions?
Well, what if…
- you were grateful for what you do have?
Appreciation & being grateful put a person into a more positive frame of mind. The negatives are pushed away. You feel happier when you think of good things.
- you started to have positive self-thoughts?
I can have anything I want. I am beautiful. I deserve love & acceptance. I am doing my best. Tomorrow, I will do better than I did today. Praise yourself for your accomplishments: I did well on that test or project; I ate healthy foods today; I increased my daily steps from 5,000 to 7,500.
- you talked to yourself & treated yourself at least as good as you expect others to treat you, or as you treat others?
Stop saying negative things to yourself. Ask for help. Could your family help you with dinner? Maybe family members could take turns preparing dinner? One night a week, dinner could be something easy to prepare or prepared. Or, maybe you could order in one night a week? Stay home from work when you are ill.
- you lowered, or at least made, your expectations more reasonable?
We are often harder on ourselves than on others. Make sure your self-expectations are reasonable & doable. Don’t expect more of yourself than you would of others. Be as tolerant of yourself as you are of others if expectations are not met; so long as the best has been done.
I guess it isn’t good to not share expectations: after all, how can I expect anyone to meet my expectations if they do not know what those expectations are?
What if you were kinder to you? You just might be on the road to being happier & more satisfied. Consider giving these suggestions a try; you just might fly.