In 2023, I had the distinct honour of speaking to the Philippine Canadian Nurses Association in Calgary and the Alberta Association of Nurses. As I stood before these rooms full of dedicated professionals, I found myself reflecting on a core truth: Knowledge is a stagnant pool unless we allow it to flow. What is the point of the countless hours we spend reading journals, attending webinars, taking courses, and absorbing data at conferences if we keep those insights to ourselves? Leadership, at its heart, is an act of sharing.
The Nightingale Blueprint
When we think of leadership in nursing, our minds often go back to Florence Nightingale. Born in 1820, she was far more than just “the lady with the lamp.” She was a statistician, a social reformer, and a pioneer of data-driven care. During the Crimean War, she didn’t just hope for better outcomes; she used numbers to prove hygiene and personalized care saved lives.
Florence was a leader not because of a title, but because she recognized a problem, gathered the evidence, and had the Emotional Intelligence to influence a system that was resistant to change.
Defining the “Everyday Leader”
We often struggle to define leadership, yet we recognize its presence immediately. It is the nurse who remains and maintains the “calm in the storm” during a code; it is the mentor who notices a colleague is struggling and offers a moment of empathy; it is the advocate who speaks up when a patient’s voice isn’t being heard.
The truth is: Everyone is a leader. Leadership isn’t a destination or a job description—it is a set of competencies that can be learned and refined. Whether you are a formal manager or an informal leader on your shift, your influence is shaped by your Emotional Intelligence (EQ).
Why EQ is the Modern Nurse’s Greatest Tool
In nursing, technical skill is the baseline, but EQ is the differentiator. Emotional Intelligence involves four key pillars that allow us to lead effectively:
- Self-Awareness: Recognizing how our own stress affects our care.
- Self-Management: Staying composed and focused under pressure.
- Social Awareness: Sensing the emotions and needs of patients and teammates.
- Relationship Management: Building the trust necessary to lead others through change.
Nurses are leaders to many. Patients and families look to us for guidance in their most vulnerable moments. We lead each other because no single nurse can know everything. When we share our insights, we aren’t just “talking shop”—we are elevating the entire profession.
The Anatomy of Nursing Leadership
If leadership isn’t about commanding, then of what is it actually made? I like to think of it as a toolkit of competencies—specific, measurable skills that we can choose to sharpen every day.
In nursing, leadership is often “quiet.” It’s the ability to influence a patient to follow a difficult treatment plan, or the ability to influence a colleague to try a more efficient workflow. These moments don’t require a podium; they require Emotional Intelligence (EQ).
The Four Pillars of the Nurse-Leaders
When I spoke in Calgary, I focused on the four pillars of EQ that transform a good nurse into a great leader. These are the skills that move us away from “commanding” and toward “connecting”:
- Self-Awareness: This is the foundation. It’s the ability to check in with yourself during a chaotic shift and realize, “I’m becoming overwhelmed, and it’s affecting how I’m speaking to my team.”
- Self-Management: Once you are aware of your emotions, how do you handle them? A leader is the one who can pause, take a breath, and choose a productive response rather than a reactive one.
- Social Awareness (Empathy): This is the “nursing superpower.” It’s the ability to read the room—to sense the unspoken anxiety of a family member or the burnout in a peer’s eyes—and acknowledge it.
- Relationship Management: This is where the “sharing” comes in. It’s about building a culture of trust where ideas can be exchanged freely. It’s the skill of navigating conflict and inspiring others toward a common goal of better patient care.
The Power of the Informal Leader
We must stop waiting for a “Charge Nurse” or “Manager” to start leading. Informal leadership is perhaps the most vital form of leadership in healthcare. When you share a better way to do a dressing change, help a colleague who is struggling, or when you advocate for a patient during rounds, you are leading.
Nurses have a front-row seat to the gaps in our healthcare system. We have insights that no one else has. But those insights only have power if we find the courage to share them. As I mentioned earlier: What is the point of learning if we aren’t going to lead the change?
Tossed Into the Deep End
Are you, or have you been, in a formal leadership role? If so, did you receive an actual roadmap for the journey, or were you simply “tossed into the deep end”?
In healthcare, we have a habit of promoting our best clinicians into leadership positions. We see a nurse who is exceptional at wound care or incredibly efficient in a code, and we say, “You’re a great nurse; you should be the Charge Nurse.” But being an expert at the bedside and being an expert at leading or managing a team are two entirely different skill sets.
Many of us started our leadership journeys without a single hour of training on how to navigate a difficult conversation, how to mentor a struggling peer, or how to manage our own “compassion fatigue.” We were expected to swim, yet we were never taught the strokes.
The Life Jacket: Emotional Intelligence
This is where Emotional Intelligence (EQ) becomes our life jacket. When we aren’t given a formal manual, EQ provides the internal compass we need. It reminds us that:
- Leadership is a practice, not a destination. Just like learning to start an IV, leadership competencies require repetition and refinement.
- The “Soft Skills” are the Hard Skills. Learning to regulate your own stress response so your team stays calm isn’t a “soft” trait—it is a critical clinical competency.
- Sharing is a Leadership Act. Going back to my original thought: if you have learned how to keep your head above water, it behooves you to share those techniques with the person currently treading water next to you.
A Final Challenge
As you move through your shift today, I challenge you to look past the titles on the badges. Look for the “quiet leaders” around you. Look for the moments where someone chose connection over command.
And most importantly, look at yourself. What insight have you gained recently—from a conference, a book, or a patient interaction—that you are holding onto? Leadership starts the moment you decide to share it.
The “Statistically Significant” Shift (The Nightingale Approach)
It’s time to reform the care of our teams. Florence Nightingale used her data to change the system. Today, we use our Emotional Intelligence to change our culture. What is one small change in how we communicate or lead that you believe would make the biggest difference in your workplace?
I want to hear from you: Let’s build a “knowledge pool” right here. Share your ideas for better nursing leadership in the comments!
“It was an honour to share these ideas in Calgary and with the AAN; now, I look forward to continuing the dialogue here with all of you.