Category: From the Heart

Breath work: A variety of Breathing Exercises.

Posted on by Dr. Elaine

Why is breath work important?

Breath work can help us relax, lower our blood pressure, & help boost the immune system by lowering our stress.

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Deep abdominal breathing encourages full oxygen exchange — that is, the beneficial trade of incoming oxygen for outgoing carbon dioxide. Not surprisingly, it can slow the heartbeat and lower or stabilize blood pressure.

Check out what Deepak Chopra has to say about the practice of Breath Work.

Harvard Health Publishing – Harvard Medical School also has information about the importance of breath work – check it out too.

Warning!!! If you feel lightheaded at any time stop & breathe normally. Though these breathing exercises are generally safe, if you have any health problems check with your physician before giving any of these breathing techniques a try.

Abdominal/Belly/Diaphragmatic Breathing –

  1. Sit or lie comfortably.
  2. Place one hand on your chest & the other hand on your belly, just below your rib cage.
  3. Breathe in slowly through your nose & feel the air move down & your abdomen rises.
  4.  Breathe out through your mouth. Let your belly relax.

 Don’t force the breath in or out. Breathe in & out smoothly. Start with doing this 3 times. Eventually, you can work up to 5 – 10 minutes.

You can do this several times a day for short periods.

Box Breathing – a powerful, yet simple, relaxation technique to return breathing to its normal rhythm. May help to clear the mind, relax the body, and improve focus.

  1. Sit or lie comfortably.
  2. Close your eyes. Breathe in through your nose while counting to four slowly. Feel the air enter your lungs.
  3. Hold your breath inside while counting slowly to four. Try not to clamp your mouth or nose shut. Simply avoid inhaling or exhaling for 4 seconds.
  4. Begin to slowly exhale for 4 seconds.
  5. Repeat steps 1 to 3 at least three times. Ideally, repeat the three steps for 4 minutes, or until calm returns.

Sistali – Cooling Breath – builds breath awareness, is said to calm hunger & thirst. As well as cooling the body, it adds moisture to the system.

  1. Sit in a comfortably.
  2. Close your eyes, practice diaphragmatic breathing for several minutes.
  3. Open you mouth & for an “O” with your lips.
  4. Stick out your tongue & curl it into a “U” shape.
  5. Inhale deeply across the tongue, into the mouth as if drinking through a straw.
  6. Focus your attention on the cooling sensation of the breath as your abdomen & lower ribs expand.
  7. Draw your tongue back in & close your mouth, exhaling completely through the nostrils.

Continue sistali for 2 – 3 minutes. Then return to diaphragmatic breathing for several minutes & repeat cooling breath for another 2 – 3 minutes. You can gradually work up to 10 minutes.

Bellows Breathing – boosts your energy, eliminates morning doldrums, strengthens your immune system. This is not a relaxation practice – it will invigorate you. Don’t do at bedtime as it could cause insomnia.

  1. Sit comfortably.
  2. Take a few deep, diaphragmatic breaths through your nostrils.
  3. When ready to begin, exhale by contracting the abdominal muscles quickly & forcefully.
  4. Immediately follow the exhale with a quick diaphragmatic inhale of equal force, letting the abdominal muscles relax.

There is a challenge to this breathing technique. You want to coordinate the action of the diaphragm & abdominal muscles, so the air is moving quickly in & out of the lungs. As the abdominal muscles relax at the end of exhalation, the diaphragm contracts to begin inhalation. After your peak inhalation the abdominal muscles immediately contract.

This exercise takes practice. I find it to be a good abdominal workout. You will have noise as you breathe in & out through your nostrils. Goal: make inhale & exhale equal.

Heart Focus Breathing – a useful technique that can be used before, during, or after stressful situation. Heart-focused breathing is about directing your attention to the heart area & breathing a bit more deeply than normal. You can practice this anywhere. At the beginning you might want to start by:

  1. Sitting comfortably.
  2. Direct your attention to the heart area & breathe a little more deeply than normal.
  3. As you breathe in imagine you are doing so through your heart.
  4. As you breathe out, imagine you do so through your heart.

(In the beginning, placing your hand over your heart as you breathe can help you direct your focus to your heart.)

Breathe in about 5-6 seconds & breathe out 5-6 seconds, or at a rate that is comfortable for you.

Testimonial

Posted on by Dr. Elaine

” I have been doing lessons with Elaine for many months now. Our lessons use basics from a program called Heart Math. The two combined has helped me immensely. I am able to get through stressful situations with a better outcome. Such as less emotional pain and damage unto myself. It can be easy to forget to listen to our bodies needs (both physical and psychological), but when you practice and apply techniques from Heart Math you become more prepared. It is like an artist with all the paints and paintbrushes they want as to before the artist would just stare at the canvas and had no art supplies, limiting themselves very much on what is in front of them. Now when I am faced with a real life situation I have all the tools. It can vary from “reframing” my thoughts, “breathing methods”, change of focus and many more.

I am not saying that my stress levels have magically disappeared, but I am saying I am much stronger and able to cope with my stressors. Which in the end makes a huge difference.

Therefore I highly recommend these sessions with Elaine. She is a great individual, willing to help and listen.”

Fear, Freedom, & Control

Posted on by Dr. Elaine

Would You Rather Be Loved or Feared?

Considering what the whole world is going through now & how afraid many people are, I thought this was a good time to share & discuss the topic of fear.

I don’t imagine this is the first time you have heard that people can be controlled with fear. Think back to world history & your own life. I’m sure you were threatened with punishment when you were a child. World history is full of wars & conquering leaders.

Many people are living in fear now, due to COVID-19. Let’s examine that fear. We were initially afraid because we didn’t know much about the disease. Then as we learned more, our fear was not abated, there was no good news. Think about this, we are still afraid & the government is continuing to spread fear, whether or not it is warranted. Besides the fear of getting ill with COVID, we are afraid because of financial changes personal & nationally. Many people have lost their jobs, businesses have shut down. We have not seen loved ones, family, or friends in a very long time. Can you imagine our seniors in long-term care homes being on their own – how afraid they must have been, & still are? I’m not sure locking down our long-term care centers was the best thing.

How does fear control us? If a wild animal, i.e. bear is approaching you, your reaction is fear – that makes sense & you will do whatever you can to save your life. If you see a car coming straight at you, going the wrong way on a one-way highway – fear is appropriate.

In many countries, the citizens fear for their lives as corrupt governments take over, & killing or imprisonment is, unfortunately, the norm. Would you rather pay large amounts of money & remain safe, or face prison or death? The large sums of money will leave you with not enough to support your family, to provide food, shelter, medical care, let alone education. Governments often promote fear as a way to control their citizens.

Think of the various religions in the world? Again, fear is spread. If you do not get the blessing of a specific religion & follow their practices you won’t go to heaven, you won’t be with your loved ones after death: your illnesses are a punishment for your “bad” behaviour. If we do not behave in school we are threatened with extra work, detention, or expulsion. On the job, ‘toe the company line’ or lose your job. All of these are examples of control by fear.

Do you fear cancer, heart attack, nuclear war, biological war, or poverty, these are not irrational fears; what can you do to eliminate or decrease your fear?

All information suggests that fear can be used to manipulate. Fear strips us of using our mind’s power to reason & act.

What can we do? Knowledge!! Knowledge is the cure to fear. I don’t suggest we live in fear of everything but, I do suggest you ask questions, be skeptical of the information you hear & read. Check out more than one source; CBC & CTV, CNN & Fox, BBC, & Al Jazeera to get the various slants on world events. Review scientific & other scholarly journals.

For a government or radical group to take over numerous small changes are repeatedly made. Once we are comfortable with one small change, then another is introduced. Be alert to what is happening in your world.

The link below is to a short video lecture that I found extremely interesting. Enjoy.

Learning to be who I am today

Posted on by Dr. Elaine

Are you the same person you were last year? 5 years ago? 10 years ago?

I was watching tv today, an old NCIS. A military man had returned from action due to war injuries. He was not adapting well. At the end of the show, he said “I guess I need to learn to be who I am today”.

That really struck me as something I need to do. Ten years ago I was feeling healthy, I was working full-time as an assistant professor of nursing, & I was pursuing a doctorate. This is similar to how I had been for most of my adult life – busy. I enjoyed it. Eight years ago I was starting to feel tired. The fatigue continues & if anything has probably gotten a bit worse. The fatigue is the result of a couple of autoimmune disorders that I have. I retired in December 2014, six months before my 65th birthday. I had planned on working till at least 70, but my health wasn’t going to let me do that.

I have been struggling ever since 2015 to come to terms with not being able to do what I want. I feel my quality of life has deteriorated. I am exhausted a lot of the time. I’m good for about 2-hours of activity per day. I have lots of things to keep me busy – reading, blogging, life coaching/mentoring, promoting the idea of Complexity Leadership, knitting, a bit of gardening, taking courses, joining online groups – but it just isn’t quite hitting the right spot with me. I still feel something is missing. I know that if I want something different, I need to do something different.

I’ve had my first COVID-19 vaccine. It is 14-months since my last chemo & I remain in remission. Spring is here & the weather is getting nice. I’m looking forward to a bit of gardening & getting together with friends. If we need to continue to distance ourselves we have a huge backyard & can easily visit & maintain a 2-meter distance. I’ve been exploring my spirituality for several years now & I enjoy the meditation & what I am learning. I’ve met many new people over social media & have great connections & supports. My family is amazing, as well as my friends.

But, now it is time for me to follow some of my own coaching/mentoring advice & dig a bit deeper into who I am now & what I really want. I am not the same person I was 10, 5, or even 1-year ago. I will revisit my values & goals. I will allow myself to dream a bit.

Maybe my expectations for myself a bit too much for me at this time. Once upon a time, I was extremely organized; that doesn’t seem to be the case anymore & I am easily distracted.

I guess this is what I will write about for the next while – if I am able to do something with it wouldn’t that be grand. I have a positive attitude & know I can do lots of things that will give me some self-satisfaction.

The challenge is on.

Changes – Something to Think about: What do we Need to change?

Posted on by Dr. Elaine

That sounds like a odd question for a life coach/mentor to be asking.

I consider myself a lifelong learner. At 70 I am still learning & working on self-development. I’ve had coaches, psychologists, been part of improvement groups, & have returned to school more times than my husband likes to think about. What am I searching for?

What I am searching for could be a long story & at times I’m not sure what that might be. I am putting myself out there to help others to decrease stress, have better sleep, dig inside to uncover their values, goals, beliefs, their desires & guide them to getting what they want. I pretty much have what I want. I have a great life. I’m not financially rich, but I am comfortable. My health could be better & I would like to have 3-5 regular clients.

Do I need to change? A few things maybe – less chocolate & wine, more activity. But, that isn’t going to change who I am. After an argument with my dear husband her wrote this song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q0Bupv1MLA0

As a coach/mentor I advertise how I can help you change. But, I’m really not sure you need to change. In fact I will state it outright – you don’t need to change. All you might want to do is discover what you already have.

You have everything you need, all the answers you need. Of course there are things you can still learn, learning is ongoing. As you learn you might decide to change some things about yourself; that is your choice. Do you need to change? Again, that is your decision, I like the idea of self-development. I like the idea & I think it is good for me. But, only you know what you need & want.

I would be thrilled to help you dig deep within to find out more about yourself. I would be happy to share tools you can use to decrease your stress, to get a better sleep, to kick-ass on that job interview or exam. But, you are everything you need to be. But, don’t go changin’ to try to please me. You are the one who matters.

#coachmentor #leadershipdevelopment #health #mentalhealth #selfcare #change #selfdevelopment

Goals, Resolutions???

Posted on by Dr. Elaine

I’ve never been big on making New Year’s Resolutions. I have goals & they are written. I like to make sure that I am in control of achieving my goals. What would be the point if there was no hope of achieving. As much as I would like to get rid of COVID-19, it is not in my control. Who knows what 2021 might bring? After what happened in 2020 I don’t think we would be surprised by much.

A few days ago my husband & I sat down to go over our goals for the future. We did it together. We figured that way we would have an idea where the other one was coming from & where we want to go. Doing so let’s us also support each other.

For the last few years, my goals were not as usual. I suspected I had only limited control over my one very important goal – to improve my health by beating cancer. In a few days, it will be one year since my chemo finished & I am still in remission. I achieved my goal.

Now it is 2021, I can have goals other than just one. However, my health is still my major goal. Rather than a goal to lose weight, I have decided that improved health is better. I know I can control those things, mostly. Other goals include; clean & tidy house, yard & small vegetable, herb garden; acquiring clients for my coaching/mentoring business, & increasing my understanding of & growing my spirituality. I think these three goals are quite enough, as they are quite complex & I need a good handle on them before I take on more.

Whether we choose to make New Year’s Resolutions, or establish goals on a regular basis & when appropriate, what we usually want is to be successful in sticking to our resolutions or achieving our goals.

Saying all that gets me to what I really want to say – whether resolutions or goals – you get to choose what you want to accomplish. I do believe we are what we think about. That is not to say you get sick, or your relationship fails because that is what you were specifically thinking or wanting. However, were you thinking ‘I am strong, healthy, & have abundant energy’, or ‘my partner & I have a magnificent relationship, constantly growing’? So it isn’t just that you weren’t thinking negative, you might not have been thinking positive thoughts. Decide what you want, think about it in positive terms, don’t worry about the outcome, & do the work that needs to be done to get what you want.

You are the captain of you. You decide what you want & you can focus your attention specifically. Make sure you have the control to make your goals a reality. That means you are not relying on someone else to make your dream (goal) come true.

Make sure your goals & resolutions are achievable by you; that they do not rely on someone or something over which you have no control. You want to succeed. If you don’t succeed in some way, reflect on what you did or didn’t do, re-strategize & try something different until you get it right. Also, celebrate what you did achieve. And remember, sometimes it takes more than one attempt.

If you need some help to sort through all this, or someone to hold you accountable give me a shout. I’m happy to chat with you, see if & how we can work together to help you make your dreams come true.

You can contact me via email at fromtheheartwithdr.elaine@gmail.com

Would You Like to Decrease Your Stress?

Posted on by Dr. Elaine

What a silly question. Doesn’t everyone want to decrease their stress? Of course, we all do. The hard thing for many of us is to figure out how. This past year, 2020, has only added stress for most people. Telling people to “not worry” doesn’t help one little bit.

I realized the other day that despite not having any reason to be feeling stressed – I was. Today I decided to take a day off. For me, that meant staying in bed for longer than usual, reading, playing a few games, fixing up some of my computer ‘stuff’, & at long last writing this blog. I had been putting it off because my blog site had disappeared – I made a mistake when I thought I was updating things. The other activities, or non-activities, of the day, have included a wee bit of tv, nothing that stretched my brain.

I know I need to practice what I preach. I also realized that a few months ago when I decided to make a few changes to my life I tried to do too much too quickly. I know better than that. But, I needed a reminder from my coach. I need to tackle one thing at a time. Right now I am taking a course – I need to focus on the course – it is short term & will be over in a few weeks. I have made a point of meditating every day. I have meditated for many years, but sometimes go for rather long stretches when I don’t (maybe a month). But, I am back at it – I feel so much better when I meditate at least once a day; why would I not do that every day?

https://unsplash.com/@keaneyefoto

The photo above appears to be a very stressed or sad person. I’ve been feeling like that the last few days – I want to curl up in a ball & ignore everyone & everything around me. Let’s make sure you don’t get to that stage. Regardless of the way I have been feeling I still want to help others. That might actually be a bit selfish – I feel better when I can help others. I don’t need to control, be in charge, or dominate. I want to help by listening, & sharing the strategies I have collected over the years (it’s been a lot of years), & guiding you to do what is best for you. Only you know what you are ready for & can do at this time.

How can I help? You might want to start with a Stress Check-List to see how much stress you are experiencing. I have included the Stress Check-List (from HeartMath) at the end of the blog. There are a plethora of ways to decrease stress. But, stress & decreasing stress aren’t one-size-fits-all. Some things are basics for everyone, but though we are all one, we are also unique & need what works for us as an individual. A few things to think about include: – sleep, healthy nutrition, exercise, meditation, yoga, a soak in a nice warm bath with Epsom salts & essential oils. Some of these are quick fixes, some are part of longer stress reduction & self-care strategies.

All of the above will help decrease stress, but you need to do them daily or frequently. I can help. As a coach/mentor I have many tools in my toolbox & I am sure we can find a few that will work for you.

Recently, I have successfully made it through cancer & chemo-therapy, coping with autoimmune disorders, retiring, & just getting old (yes, even aging can be a stressor).

Do you have too much stress?

Everyone responds to stress differently. Use this checklist to assess the impact stress is having
on your life and if it’s time to do something about it.

Low stress levels
 feel well
 I am able to relax
 Physical recreation brings me pleasure
 Increasing pressure enhances my performance
 My thinking is clear and I learn easily
 I am able to say “No”
 Others see me as adaptable and approachable

Moderate stress levels
 I feel driven, hyperactive, and restless
 I tend to make snap decisions but with errors
 I feel over-burdened but can still say “No”
 I often feel tired but am taking steps to recover
 I often try to squeeze a few extra drops out of my performance
 Discipline, fitness, social pressure and stimulants play a greater role in my ability to perform
 My sleep is just about adequate
 Others see me as tired yet successful


High stress levels
 I don’t think as clearly as I used to
 I feel irritable and “on edge”
 I complain and grumble regularly
 I work longer hours but get less done
 I have repeated minor ailments, aches and pains
 I am exhausted, have poor endurance and my work/life balance is suffering
 I am unable to distinguish the essential from non-essential
 I have sleep problems
 I feel like I’m l operating in survival mode
 I accept excessive burdens and see them as inevitable
 Others see me as energized and successful

Contact your HeartMath® Certified Coach for more information.

Elaine Rose

  • phone/text: 403-561-0185
  • email: fromtheheartwithdr.elaine@gmail.com
  • book an appointment: https://calendly.com/fromtheheartwithdr-elaine

© 2015 HeartMath LLC. HeartMath is a registered trademark of the Institute of HeartMath.

Changes – The Only Thing On Which We Can Rely

Posted on by Dr. Elaine

I have never been afraid of change. Everything is constantly changing. The world is experiencing huge change because the COVID-19 Pandemic is having an effect on everyone. It is just one of the changes I have experienced over the last seven years. Some of the changes have not been pleasant. However, I have learned a lot. Just as I expect to do in any experience.

I am a big supporter of self-care & have been for many years. I rudely discovered I wasn’t doing quite enough. I am a stubborn person & it took me quite a while to listen. If I had listened to my body a bit sooner maybe I wouldn’t have had seven years of health changes that were anything but pleasant.

In 2013 our home was flooded during the great flood of Calgary. Not good; but, I had been wanting to get rid of the carpet in the basement & make a few other changes. What an opportunity. About a week later that I found out why I had been so incredibly tired for the past year or two – I had an autoimmune disease. Changes.

I had always thought of self-care as going for a massage, a mani-pedi, or as simple as a nice soak in the tub. I also knew that self-care meant not taking on too much & being able to say “no”.

With the news of an autoimmune disease, I listened to my body & I slowed down. Not enough. I adapted, somewhat. I found not being able to do all I wanted very frustrating. I wasn’t able to work enough to keep my job. I retired, not what I wanted, but what I had to do. I hadn’t been without a job in about 40 years. But, I had lots of things to do, just not enough energy to do them all.

Still not feeling well my doctor was watching me & referring me to appropriate specialists. I had my gallbladder removed because of stones & nausea almost every day. The surgery went smooth & I was feeling great the next day & attended my granddaughter’s grade 12 grad just 3 days later.

A week later, things changed. I awoke in great pain. Back to the hospital for a week’s stay, I had pancreatitis. I took the entire summer to recover. A great change to how I would normally spend the summer.

I never got back to feeling well, but I kept plugging along doing what I could to regain strength & endurance. Various symptoms continued to develop. Tests & referrals to a variety of doctors. Eventually, it was noted that my spleen was getting quite large (I hadn’t been able to eat much for several months & my weight was dropping. I was very happy to lose the weight, I needed to drop many pounds. The doctors weren’t quite so happy. Surgery was in order to remove the spleen. I think that went as well as could be expected. The spleen was cancerous, as the doctors had suspected. With my spleen removed I was considered in remission, I would only need to be followed by the cancer clinic. I could handle that. Again doing well recovering from the surgery. Having surgeries was a big change for me & I was pretty happy with both. As a retired ICU nurse, I was very aware of many things that could go wrong.

About a month after the splenectomy, I started to not feel well again. Another change that I wasn’t too happy about. More tests. Off to the hospital again. I wasn’t feeling too bad, & was surprised that the hospital kept me. A couple of days later that changed. I thought I was going to die & the doctors couldn’t figure out what was wrong. A different cancer this time. I was thrilled that it was just cancer & could be treated with chemotherapy & was expected to have a full recovery.

The chemotherapy routine was different – another change. My husband was a marvelous caregiver; I will be forever grateful to him. I finished chemotherapy in February 2020. COVID hit & within a month we were in lockdown. However, that wasn’t a big change for me; I had been very careful since my spleen was removed because no spleen decreases your resistance to infection.

What changes have occurred since then? Well, nothing very major. Another autoimmune disorder, but not much different than what I already had.

Changes

Elaine
Before Chemo
During Chemo

Every day we undergo changes we don’t notice. In one day 2 to 3 million red blood cells are produced. As cells are produced others are dying. As many as 1011 cells die each day in adults. These are only some of our cells. Different cells live for various amounts of time. Just as we cannot step in the same river twice, we are a different person every day with many new cells. Change in you, in me, every day: wow!

When faced with change I suggest looking at what you can learn. Discover how change can be of benefit, or provide the source for an adventure. Whether it is health, how you are functioning in this world, or discovering more about yourself you have a choice to embrace change & make sure you emerge a better person OR you can choose to let the change control you.

I am working to build my coaching/mentoring business. As I do this work, I realize I have lots to learn, not the least is more about technology. I am much more aware of the positive changes we can make. Sometimes we need to make changes so we can manage the changes we have accepted in the past. I love helping people discover the wonderful things they can do with just a bit of discovery & guidance.

What changes would you like to make? Oh my gosh, we can actually choose to make changes. Where do you want to be in 5 years? Will you need to make some changes to get there? Will there also be changes that ‘just happen’?

Book a time in my calendar to schedule a free chat to uncover your strengths & move forward to make your dreams come true.

What is Your Life’s Purpose?

Posted on by Dr. Elaine

I have set goals for myself for as long as I can remember. When I achieved one life goal I would start on another. But, purpose, I wasn’t quite sure what that was or if I had one. Wife, mother, grandmother, step-mother, registered nurse, volunteer, board member… were these purposes or just examples of who I was & what I was doing? I figured they were just descriptors of what was important to me.

If I didn’t have a life’s purpose then what the heck was this life all about.

Deepak Chopra tells us that according to Dharma’s Law “there’s at least one thing you can do better than anyone else on the entire planet.” I have also heard this from other spiritual leaders. So what is that one thing you can do better than anyone else? I think I was meant to help people. I’m not 100% sure of just how I am to go about that, but I am doing my best to help in a variety of ways.

I was an RN for over 30 years. Being a nurse was very rewarding. I loved my job. But, I am now retired & my health won’t allow me to work as an RN any longer. So how do I help people? Being a nurse fulfilled my purpose of helping others.

I looked up what Deepak Chopra had to say on the subject of Life’s Purpose.

If we choose to follow Dharma’s Law there are three steps:

1. Decide to seek your higher self

2. Find your unique talent or gift

3. Ask, how can I use my unique talent or gift to help others & be of service to humanity

Regardless of religion or spiritual beliefs, I think we all want to be the best we can possibly be. Prior to retiring it was easy to identify my purpose of helping others. Is my purpose still the same? I’m not sure if I know how to help others if I am not at the bedside or providing direct patient care. But, I might be learning.

I hope that through my Blog I will be of help to those who read it & that it will encourage readers to contact me to find out how I can be of service. My HeartMath & Life Coaching of benefitted some. I have not done much of anything to advertise or promote what I do. I think it is now time.

Benefits of Meditation

Posted on by Dr. Elaine


I have been meditating for several years. I do a variety of types of meditation. Today I got Dr. Joe Dispenza’s Newsletter for August. In that newsletter were a couple of articles on meditation. I found the article on the benefits of meditation very informative & easy to understand.

Though we are all connected, we have different wants & needs. You might not think meditation is for you. There are other things you might find more to your liking. A body scan, progressive muscle relaxation, focused breathing, or visualization might be more along the lines of something with which you are comfortable. If so, you will get the same benefits, it is merely another form of meditation. Check out Dr. Joe’s Newsletter article

A reminder: I am at your service. Please send an email to set up a free consultation.